Yesterday my Beagle told me:

– Don’t worry, Nikolay. A better day will come for you too. There will be a day when you too will have 96% duck!

Did you know that lying can fry your nervous system turning you into a a walking zombie?

Here’s how:

Today was a beautiful day. Sunny and cool. I spent the day outside doing only relaxing things – leisurely walks, a few hours sipping coffee at Legacy Shops, ate good and tasty things. Life as it should be, you know.

Now my nervous system is fried. Why?

Because it was not a relaxing day. I lied to you.

I had a friend that worked with wine.  A sommelier.  Knows everything there is to know about wines.

He told me:  “Wine is a matter of taste. Nobody can tell you which wine will taste best to you. And what you eat with the wine is also a matter of personal taste and and the unique way the flavors mix for you.”

I believe he is right.

But I really wanted to tell him about Russians in some parts of the Great Motherland which gulp down a glass of vodka and then, instead of eating something, they raise their arm and smell the armpit.

But I had pity for my sommelier friend.

***

Имах един познат работеше с вино.

Знае всичко дето има да се знае за виното.

И вика “То е въпрос на вкус. Никой не може да ти каже кое е хубаво за твойта уста. И това дето го ядеш с виното и то е въпрос на вкус и смесване на вкуса.”

Мисля че е прав.

Много ми се щеше обаче да му разкажа за руснаците дето като пивнат една чаша водка и след това си миришат подмишницата за мезе. Но го съжалих.

It was 1978 and I was playing on the street. I saw two younger boys walk by me carrying two pieces of wood and a small hammer.

I asked them “What are you going to do?”.

They said “Build and airplane!”.

I was a kid but already old enough to laugh at their idea.

Stupid little kids, I tell you. Don’t you agree?

“There are 3 ways to learn – painful, embarrassing, and expensive.”

To that I can add: “At times they all come together.”

Consider yourself lucky if they don’t.

– And where is Babushka?

– I’m substituting for her.

Each one of us should finally nail it in their heads:

When you are a monkey you do what monkeys do regardless of anything.

I know that applies to your life too.

One day in 2013.I listen to radio.

They are reporting on the meteorite that flew over and exploded over the city of Chelyabinsk, Russia.

Then they play a live recording. You hear a swooshing sound, people talking, then an explosion.

Than a clear Russian voice screams “Ебать!!!”.

I died laughing.

“See! You can when you want.” my grandmother always said.

That has proven to be so true.

When you want it doesn’t matter if you can or cannot.

When you want it doesn’t matter if you know or don’t know.

When you want it will happen.

“You can when you want” indeed.

But note – your nature shows in what you want.

That’s it!

Soon a big pale hairy Bulgarian will be walking a little white dog.

His tiny fluffy white terrier now WITH PIGTAILS AND TINY BOWS!

That’s why I do not eat pork.

Because some of my dogs act like pigs.